Problem Solving Marathon Ep 4 - Sandeep Maheswari's Life-Changing Answers

In this powerful session, people asked deep life questions about anxiety, relationships, purpose, karma, self-thinking, and idols. Sandeep Maheshwari gave practical, direct, and eye-opening answers.

Let’s understand each question with simplified explanations and real-life examples.

Question 1.
I get sudden death anxiety. How do I deal with it?
The Question:

“Sir, I’m a practicing advocate. For the past 2-3 months, I’ve been getting strong anxiety about sudden death – like heart attack anxiety. Even while talking to you, my heart beats fast. How do I deal with it?”

Sandeep Sir’s Answer (Explained):

1. You are not creating this anxiety; the algorithm is. Social media shows too many sudden death news. This is called recency bias – your mind keeps thinking about what it recently saw repeatedly.
Example:
Earlier too, young deaths happened, but now every such news reaches you instantly on Instagram, YouTube, etc.

2. First step – out of sight, out of mind. Stop consuming such content. Skip it so that social media algorithms stop showing them.

3. Check the reality medically. If you fear heart attack, do all necessary tests. If tests are normal, your fear is psychological, not physical.

4. The real solution:
Stop giving attention to such thoughts and content. The moment you ignore them, they stop controlling you.

Question 2.
I give my 100% to relationships but people don’t value it. Should I stay alone?
The Question:

“Sir, I build meaningful relationships and friendships but people don’t give back equally. I end up stepping back and becoming lonely. Is it better to stay alone than be with such people?”

Sandeep Sir’s Answer (Explained):

1. The root problem is expectations. You expect too much in return.

Example:
If you smile at someone, don’t expect them to say “thank you so much for smiling.”

2. Divide people in life compartments.
Core Circle (inner circle): Only 2-5 people – close friends, family.

Outer Circles: Office colleagues, neighbours, casual friends.

Lesson:
Don’t force anyone into your inner circle if they don’t naturally belong there.

3. Maintain people at their correct place.
E.g., an office colleague is just a colleague – don’t treat them like childhood friends.

 

Question 3.
Where do we stop in life? Is ‘finding your why’ an illusion?
The Question:
“Sir, I set goals, achieve them, feel happy for a while, but then that feeling fades. Is finding our purpose an illusion created by mind just to stay directed?”

Sandeep Sir’s Answer (Explained):

1. ‘Why’ is just a thought created by mind.
No child is born with a ‘why’. They just have basic needs – food, safety, love.

2. Life’s purpose is life itself. All goals and purposes are illusions (mirage).
Like water seen in desert mirage – it looks real from far, but disappears when you reach.

3. How to live meaningfully then?
Do what you enjoy doing without attachment or identity.
Play life’s roles like an actor plays different characters, but doesn’t become them.
Example:
An actor plays a beggar’s role, then goes home in his car. He doesn’t cry thinking he’s a beggar in real life.

4. Mature living means…
You switch roles easily.
You do your karmas (actions) without worrying about fruits. Keep moving forward without getting stuck.

Question 4.
If purpose is an illusion, where does karma fit in?
Follow-up Question:
“If there’s no real purpose, where does karma (action) come in when the Gita says do karma without worrying about fruits?”

Sandeep Sir’s Answer (Explained):

1. Karma is the roles you play in life. Just keep doing your roles well.
Set goals, act on them, but don’t get stuck anywhere.

Question 5.
How much should I think about myself vs family vs others?
The Question:

“Sir, my mind is always thinking – about myself, husband, kids, work, life. How much should we think about ourselves?”

Sandeep Sir’s Answer (Explained):

1. Ideal scenario – think zero about yourself.
True happiness is when you are not thinking about yourself at all.

Example:
In deep sleep, you’re happiest, because you don’t exist there as a ‘thinking self’.

2. While awake, engage fully in tasks.
When you’re fully involved in an activity (work, sport, talking, learning), you forget yourself. That is a blissful state.

3. Fill your day with such activities.
Divide your day into chunks:
Something new to learn.

Work to do deeply.
Light gossip or playful time.
Exercise or yoga.

Lesson:
The more you remain busy in meaningful or light-hearted activities, the less your mind overthinks.

Question 6.

Who is your inspiration or idol?
The Question:

“Sir, you are an inspiration for so many, but who is your idol?”

Sandeep Sir’s Answer (Explained):

1. I have no idol, nor do I want to be anyone’s idol.
Don’t idolise people. Learn different qualities from everyone instead.

2. Why?
Every person is a mix of good and bad.
If you idolise someone, their flaws will shock you.
If you hate someone, you ignore their good qualities.
Example:
Your parents are humans with strengths and weaknesses. Respect them, but don’t make them idols.

Lesson:
Focus on learning traits rather than idolising people.

Final Powerful Lessons:

• Don’t let social media control your fears.
• Understand expectations and place people correctly in life.
• Purpose is an illusion, living is the purpose.
• Do your karmas without worrying about results.
• Engage deeply in work, hobbies, learning to avoid overthinking.
• Learn qualities, don’t make idols.

Your Action Steps Today:

• Identify 3 content types to stop consuming to reduce anxiety.
• List 5 people and their correct ‘circle’ in your life.
• Do one thing today that fully involves you and makes you forget yourself.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

## Some Useful Products You Can Checkout

[Gratitude Journal with Habit Tracker & Mood Tracker for Wellness + Free Stickers](https://amzn.to/3GEGTtN)

[KITOME To Do List Planner – Acrylic Daily Planner Dry Erase Board with Wooden Base, Marker & Duster (24x18cm)    (https://amzn.to/463oPE1) 

[Dr. A. P. J. Abdul Kalam Poster for Wall – Affirmations Wall Frame]    (https://amzn.to/4lNlkpF)

[Animusphere Pocket Notebook (2 Pack) – Small Leather Journal with Pen Holder & Page Marker Ribbons.   (https://amzn.to/3GoTHo5)

 

Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links. If you buy through these links, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. Thanks for your support!

-------------WISH YOU ALL THE BEST-----------

Credits:

This post is inspired by “Problem Solving Marathon Ep 4” by Sandeep Maheshwari. The learnings are explained in my own words for educational and motivational purposes.